Everyone has problems in life. This can involve yourself with your partner, friends, family, or co-workers. The strategy of each person to solve a problem is also different.
It turns out that there is a type of person with a tendency to constantly avoid problems which is often known as stonewalling. Reporting from the Very Wellmind page, stonewalling is one form of a person's coping mechanism whose goal is to avoid conflict.
Stonewalling is done unintentionally or intentionally which actually has a bad impact on a relationship. Want to know more about stonewalling? Let's see!
1. Definition of Stonewalling
Stonewalling when interpreted literally is a stone wall. Actually stonewalling is a person's attitude to close themselves and refuse interaction with other people. This is usually done intentionally when involved in a conflict or argument.
People who are used to stonewalling tend to feel uncomfortable when it comes to discussing and expressing their feelings. If done continuously, stonewalling will become a habit.
Of course, this attitude will make people around you feel uncomfortable, depressed, and frustrated. Small problems that are constantly ignored will have a bigger impact.
2. Signs
It is often quite difficult to notice when dealing with someone who has a habit of stonewalling. There are several signs to recognize stonewalling, such as almost always ignoring what other people say that you don't like, suddenly changing the subject, or refusing to answer questions from the other person.
Usually the body language of people who are doing stonewalling is to spin the ball when someone is talking.
3. Cause
Basically, stonewalling becomes a behavior that arises from feelings of fear, anxiety, and frustration. There are several reasons why someone does this, including avoiding conflict, not wanting to be blamed for something, and even a means of manipulating the situation to get what they want.
Stonewalling is often done by someone who feels weak and doesn't have an advantage as a mechanism to show strength.
4. Stonewalling Type
There are two types of stonewalling that may appear in a love or friendship relationship. The first is accidental stonewalling. This is done to overcome problems that are heavy enough so as not to cause fights. People who do stonewalling will tend to avoid unwanted topics of conversation.
The second type is intentional stonewalling. This is usually done by manipulating the situation and tending to blame the other person. Intentional stonewalling is usually a form of punishment to the interlocutor which can be categorized as emotional abuse.
5. Impact
Stonewalling has a considerable impact on a relationship, especially for the person who is the victim of this behavior. When the attitude of stonewalling is often done, then the relationship will become tenuous and even end badly. It also creates frustration and a sense of unappreciation.